Today’s teenagers have been stereotyped as adventurous and harebrained individuals.  They are generally fond of experimenting with things until they get in touch with drugs, sex, guns, alcohol among others. According to the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention figures, 16,000 young adults die each year from unintentional injuries and accidents.  The most common justification for teenagers’ care-free attitude is that their brains just aren’t developed enough to know better. However, recent research shows that in some cases the fact is just the opposite, the brain matures not too slowly but perhaps, too quickly.

According to a psychiatrist, an adolescent who engages in more dangerous activities have white-matter pathways that seem to be more mature than those of risk-averse youths.  White-matter is the brain’s wiring, the neutral pathways that connect the various gray-matter regions of the cerebrum that are independent of one another.  Having a mature white-matter is necessary because it allows faster brain processing speed.  Nerve impulses also travel faster in mature white-matter. Experiments also reveal that the more mature the look of the brain, the more adventurous the teenager tended to be.
Another possible explanation is that some teenagers whose brains develop more rapidly than others become uncomfortable and a little confused owing to the gap between their biological capabilities and the social norms they must follow as kids. Precocious development of these neural tracts may make some adolescents more susceptible to engage in behaviors that society considers too adult in nature for their chronological age. It is also a common notion that teens make dumb decisions because their brains are immature. In other words, having a more mature brain may actually motivate some teens to try out new and potentially harmful experiences.
For now, these theories are mere speculation, and the researchers concede that the interaction of white and gray matter is so complex that hard conclusions remain elusive. The results of the study are relatively bare and by no means conclusive. The human brain is so intricate in nature, and one has to consider the fact that there are other factors that come into play such as the environment and certain genetic predispositions that are equally complex to study.

Just recently, CNN reported a heart-breaking news about a Berkeley teen who was convicted in the murder of his father. The victim was raising three kids on his own when one of them, for reasons unknown, murdered him with a gunshot to the head.  The judge handling the case found the 16-year-old teen guilty of first-degree murder with an enhancement for using a gun in the death of his 40-year-old father.

When the teen was sentenced, the judge could have him locked up in the California Division of Juvenile Justice until he reaches the age of 25. He could also face a variety of other sentences, including being placed on probation and sent home, being sent to a group home or placed in minimum security reform centers. Regardless of what happens, a life was lost and the life of the teenager and those of his siblings are put in jeopardy with the uneventful passing of their father who is supposed to guide them in today’s chaotic environment.

Teen violence is increasingly becoming one of the most serious problems of modern society. It is a curse not only for the victim but for his/her family and the entire society as well. It is also responsible for thousands of deaths every year around the world.  This kind of violence alienates the victim from his/her family, friends and loved ones. Teenagers who engage in violence, generally try to keep themselves away from everyone. Psychologists explain that they do so for the sake of getting away from social embarrassment. Teen abuse lawyers advocate that the victim must get proper legal support at such delicate phase of her/his life.

Young adults are complicated, inquisitive, and filled with potential. Once left unchecked, they can blow up in a million pieces, causing problems resulting to irreparable damage or even death. This is precisely the reason why parents are endowed with the moral obligation to guide their teens during this crucial stage in their lives.

Oftentimes teenagers find their peer groups to be more significant to them than their parents. This being the case, it is as if parents are handling over the life of their teen to the type of group he/she may belong to. With this change come different expectations. This is why friends are such a key developmental and influential factor in the teenage years. Many teens who get involved in gangs are simply trying to live out their new group’s expectations rather than their parents’. Adolescents are all on an equal plane when it comes to violent behavior. Regardless of background, almost all adolescents become significantly more violent after puberty and it drops off again somewhere in their mid-20s.

It is amazing how fast things can change; how pure innocence can turn to arrogance and adventuresome. It seems up until your first year in high school, you feel safe from anything. You are preoccupied with life as how you knew it from the start, when in school you’re intrigued to hear rumors in junior high, they’re usually about who likes who, and who broke up with who. It just seems so naive. But when you stepped into high school, it becomes an entirely different ballgame. Somehow you seem to have been stripped of all your innocence. Suddenly you become vulnerable to the evils that you knew nothing about before. It seems the only thing people talk about is either sex or drug use. We all know of so many personalities who have so much potential to do great things in life, but threw it all away when they started to use drugs.

This is the daunting scenario that we have today. We are aware of it, the government is aware of it, law enforcers are aware of it but still the nagging problem persists and threatens the fragile future of our youth today. Numbers don’t lie. Nearly half of all high school seniors in America have experimented with illegal drugs and about three quarters have tried alcohol. A study conducted on the drug use prevalence among high school seniors in the US revealed the following: 41.8% have tried marijuana and at least 5% uses it everyday; 7.8% have used cocaine; 1.5% have tried heroin; 72.2% have used alcohol and 3.1% take alcohol daily; 6.5% have tried ecstasy; 8.4% have tried using hallucinogens (LSD, Magic Mushrooms, Peyote); and at least 15.4% have reported having used prescription drugs (Vicodin, OxyContin etc.) to get high. These are alarming statistics but equally disturbing is how easily high school students can get hold of these prohibited drugs. The dilemma that we have today is worse than what our parents had to deal with; and at the rate things are going it is quite likely that by the time you have kids, the situation will be ten times worse than what it is today.

The problem should be addressed now with more stringent measures and from different fronts. It should be a collective and conscious effort from the government, school administrations and more importantly the parents. Parents should be educated about the dangers facing their teens today because they are for real and are likely to stay if nothing is done to stem the problem. The government should make laws with much more teeth in them so as to deter drug dealers and manufacturers who are selling these substances like pancakes. Schools must have more effective screening and monitoring systems to keep drugs away from their vicinity and thus give their students a good shot for a productive college life.  Illicit drugs seem to fall in and out of favor with experimental youths.  But one thing is constant, more and more teens are experimenting with it. The perils are great and more threatening than ever, but studies consistently show that teens whose parents talk to them about drugs are at a much lower risk to experiment.

Remember the old adage ‘Actions speak louder than words’? Well, it is perfectly applicable in this context. While parenting teens, the parent need to effectively monitor their influence or impact that has a direct correlation with their child.

Children always take cue for their behavior from what they actually see. We have a common habit of instructing our children to do something while following a different set of rules ourselves. And then if you blurt that ‘do as I say and not what I do’, it will have a negligible impact. If you promote such a practice, one day you shall surely get to hear something of this sort, ‘what is wrong if I smoke pot, my parents get stoned on alcohol every night’!

While dealing with a troubled teen, the parents need to supervise as they guide. When you find your teen misbehaving in spite of the responsibilities and the privileges that you have provided them with, you ought to understand that are unconsciously seeking directives to apprehend the limitations of their limitations and behavior. It is here that you are required to assure them with moderate and selective guidance. It is a delicate situation and your reasonable attitude will prevent an unfortunate breakdown of communication. 

A troubled teen is already confused. So do not screw up the situation further by being ambivalent or partially expressive. Spell out through words and action regarding what is exactly expected of them. Encourage and appreciate their participation in the family’s decision making. This will help them in learning to realize and welcome responsibility and the necessity of accountability.

At the same time you are also required not to intrude your teen’s individuality and independence. Do not enforce your ideas, rather adopt the position of a watchful friendly bystander, who is always ready to offer help and advice but when required.
Another important aspect that one ought to remember while parenting that one should never over-react.

Parents often have this preconceived notion that their child’s adolescent period is an arduous struggle. They seem to brace up for an onslaught. This sort of attitude takes the ease out of the environment. A cool and calm attitude will not only make your child comfortable but also help you to assess their behavior with a more rational outlook. It will reduce the tendency of the parents to self-assert and draw effective trust and confidence from the teenager. This will of course ease up communication and a healthy parent-child relationship. 

Parenting an adolescent is not simple. It takes creativity, willpower and tolerance! It is a difficult journey. While there is no magic spells that will make teens behave in a different manner, you can accomplish the similar extreme transformation by learning how to tackle your child and approach your adolescent in order to get the outcome you desire.

Here are some parenting tips:

1. Accept the adolescent the way they are: Accept your child and his/her rebelliousness, and prepare yourself to tolerate that reality. If the child is disobedient and defiant, it doesn’t mean you also have to behave in a similar manner. Move on with your life, be happy and keep a belief that in all likelihood, everything will be fine in few years time. It’s not going to be easy. As parents want to improve the child as soon as possible. Be enduring and positive. Just bear in mind that the majority of children who go off the profound end as teenagers eventually re-emerge as responsible, mature adults.

2. When the adolescent is off track, you need to take extra pain and effort to secure and support the bonds of affection and apprehension connecting you and your child. Parents must stop getting disappointed. They should stop lecturing the child all the time, stop fuming, grieving, being mournful and start giving. Parents should show their love and care through gestures. Hug your child, tell him/her of your love and show that you care. Smile at them, laugh with them even though you are crying from within or are angry. It is necessary to put up an act. However, the act should be a sincere one. All children love being loved and want loving parents. Your child may disappoint you, but being parents and mature you should always be there for them and never disappoint them.

3. Never protect your teenagers from the responsibility and penalty of their actions and deeds. Consequences are the supreme teachers in our lives. When we protect our teenagers against the consequences of their actions and deeds, we alter reality and hinder their healthy growth and development.  Hence the child will never learn how to tackle the consequences of his own actions.

Support the institutions of Society that scatter penalty. If your child attains a speeding ticket, the police are not to be blamed. If the child is caught shoplifting, the company security is not to be blamed. If he is caught in possession of tobacco, drugs or alcohol and is sent to the juvenile court, the justice system or the court is not to be blamed. Getting caught is possibly the greatest thing that can happen to children who take on illegal actions.