2010 July | Parenting Teens Blog

July 10, 2010

PTSD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in Teens

PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is a stress reaction that comes suddenly and holds on tight to a person, it is caused by a traumatic experience, an event that imprints in the mind and body of a person. In 99% cases the person that has PTSD was involved in something traumatic like a natural disaster, car accident, abuse, assault, sexual; attack, terrorist attack and similar. A person doesn’t actually have to be hurt to experience PTSD, just witnessing something of the above mentioned can lead to PTSD. In most of the cases that is because of highly intense feeling of horror, fear and helplessness.

Anyone can be stressed after such a situation for weeks and even months, but PTSD is different. People with PTSD have a highly intense feeling of fear and in some cases paranoia which lasts for more than a month, sometimes years. In most cases PTSD appears immediately after the trauma, but in some cases it can be delayed and show up after some time. If you are not sure if your teenager has a PTSD after witnessing something terrible here are the symptoms:

-    They go through the traumatic experience over and over again, reliving the same situation. Nightmares, flashbacks or horrifying mental images are most common in people with PTSD.
-    People with PTSD try to avoid anything that reminds them of the unfortunate event. So in some cases PTSD goes that deep that people will try to avoid certain people, places, activities and everything that reminds them of the event.
-    Some may experience emotional numbness or in other words, they may stop caring about things and people they cared for before the event.
-    They can be jumpy to put it simple; they can be easily startled, always on edge, tense and nervous all the time. High level of stress can do that to a person; also some may have trouble sleeping.

PTSD can affect anyone, from little kids, teens and adults to senior citizens, it doesn’t choose. PTSD will not go on its own, so treatment is necessary. It can last for months, years, go away and then come back again, so treatment and support is necessary.

The best bet is to go to a professional therapist that specializes in dealing with anxiety issues and PTSD. Most forms of therapy with a patient suffering from PTSD involve talking in a safe environment and learning to cope with fear, anxiety and panic. In some cases medications are used to help people sleep, reduce anxiety and depression.

Healing from a PTSD is a long process, a person that once get’s PTSD cannot simply let go of those fears and they remain with him forever. But with treatment and support people can learn to cope with the situation and fear they carry with them. This is a more delicate situation when it comes to children, as they need treatment and attention immediately or they can be scared for life. So if you child suffers any of those symptoms after witnessing something bad be sure to take your child to a therapist immediately.

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July 9, 2010

Single Parenting – It Can Be Done

Filed under: help for parents — Tags: parenting teens, parenting teens blog, single parent, single parenting, single parents — admin @ 8:03 am

Being a parent is never easy, especially for single mothers and fathers raising a child on their own. Whatever the reason for being single, death, divorce, adoption, each parent can successfully raise a child, with love and passion everything is possible. There are a few things a parent needs to focus on, especially a single parent, as there is one thing a single parent cannot do, and that is to take both roles of mother and father.

Except trying to provide a good future for your child and making sure he has a good education and love from you as a parent, there are several things more that you need to do to provide the secure feeling for your child. The first thing is one that most single parents think of last, take care of yourself. If you do not look after yourself you will not be able to maintain a healthy relationship with your child.
Once you have that covered you will notice much less problems with your child, but you still have a long road ahead of you. Try building a network of friends around you, other single parents and such.

You need to make sure your child understands you and that you understand your child. He will be insecure as most children of single parents are, so reassure him that he is special and show him that you love him in both words and deeds.

The best way to make sure that you are raising your child properly is setting a good example. Remember, children look up to parents and if we do something they are likely to repeat it. In fact it’s much easier for a single parent to take care of this aspect as there are no two role models for the child, so if you set a good example you can be sure that your child will follow.

At some point you will have to involve your child into decision making around the house. Don’t be afraid to do that as it will help your child and his confidence, he we feel more appreciated when he is involved.

A most common mistake single parents make is to spoil and overindulge their children. That is very easy to do when you are a single parent, but it will not benefit your child in any way. The children that are spoiled and overindulged often turn to be self-centered, narcissistic, have lack of motivation, and have self-control problems.

There are plenty of things to cover on this subject, but the most important thing to remember is that there is no such thing as a perfect parent. We all make mistakes, but being a parent means we have to acknowledge our mistakes and deal with them maturely and with responsibility, and most of all to learn from them. This way we can overcome the issues that show up along the way and deal with them, showing our children the power of strength and character that comes from love.

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July 8, 2010

Inspire Your Teenage Child

Filed under: Teen Inspiration — Tags: inspire teen, inspire teenage child, Inspire Your Teenage Child, parenting teens, parenting teens blog, Teen Inspiration — admin @ 6:31 pm

As a parent you sure want what is best for your child, there is no doubt about it. The best way to ensure the best for them is to motivate and inspire your teen children to realize their potential and dig for the extra greatness in them. By doing that effectively you can sit back and watch proudly how your children are succeeding in this world in whatever they do and wherever they go. Sounds nice, like a dream, but how do we motivate our teens, how do we inspire them?

The first thing that you need to do is figure out what drives your child, what motivates him, when you find that out you can easily inspire them to do great things. So the first thing you should do is get to know your child better, talking to them always helps. The moment you do realize their motives be sure to praise them and support them in their dreams and wishes, which will make a teen fly to the roof, although sometimes just for a few minutes, but in some cases it can be permanent.

A great way to inspire a teen is to believe in him. When a child sees that the parent trusts him that boosts his self confidence and that does wonders for the teen inspiration. Also, be sure to encourage your teen’s creativity, getting excited about something is the greatest form of inspiration.

You have to understand that one thing that surely destroys teen inspiration is a parent making an impossible goal for their child. Don’t be a perfectionist; don’t push your child too hard. A child is a child and it should be allowed to feel like one. A 15 year old kid that has to study for hours and hours and then do other important activities of your choosing doesn’t have a childhood and can hardly be inspired to do something on its own. A child like that will have one inspiration only, and that is to satisfy your needs because of some morbid strictness you nurture towards your child and his future. That is not a child; that is a zombie.

Sometimes letting go and allowing your child a bit more freedom is what will make the world go around for them. They have to be allowed freedom to be able to express themselves and show creativity. If you tell them what to do their entire life they will never be able to stand alone on their own two feet and they will never be inspired to do so in the first place.

In the end you as a parent have the responsibility towards your child and his future, by creating a healthy environment for your child’s development and so called brain activity your child will be on its way to a better future thinking with his own head. In the end that is what we all want for our kids, to show independence together with responsibility, the best combination in the world.

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July 6, 2010

Dyslexia, Problem of the Most Gifted Kids

Filed under: Dyslexia — Tags: Dyslexia, dyslexia problem, gifted kids, kids dyslexia, kids with dyslexia, parenting teens, parenting teens blog, Problem of the Most Gifted Kids, speech sounds — admin @ 11:31 am

Dyslexia is a problem many kids have to deal with; it is a problem where kids have a hard time reading and spelling. The fact is that some of the most intelligent and gifted kids have to deal problem. Dyslexia doesn’t choose, it can be a problem for anyone at any age, but it can be dealt with.

According to Kids Health, kids that have dyslexia struggle with the basics of reading and reading consists of:

   1. Understand the way speech sounds make up words.
   2. Focus on printed marks (letters and words).
   3. Connect speech sounds to letters.
   4. Blend letter sounds smoothly into words.
   5. Control eye movements across the page.
   6. Build images and ideas.
   7. Compare new ideas with what is already known.
   8. Store the ideas in memory.

Those are quite a few processes going on at the same time, so no wonder we can have problems with it. The fact is that kids with dyslexia have trouble with the first few steps, so you can only imagine how hard the rest of the reading process can be for them.

Dyslexia is a problem of the brain; brain struggles to connect letters and sounds. So for kids with dyslexia it is almost impossible to separate speech sounds or to spell. So being difficult to separate speech sounds for a simple word like “who” or “car” it is really hard for them to do that with a long sentence and connect different letters and soundly connect them to other letters and form complete words.

Most of the kids with dyslexia read very slow and make quite a number of mistakes and very often they will blend words or separate them, making a simple sentence like:

- Johnny is going fishing tomorrow morning.

To sound something like:

- Johnny isgoi ng fish ing tomorr owmor ning.

Or something like that.

The teaching for the kids with dyslexia has to be special, a child with dyslexia will never learn to read properly with normal education, so special methods are available for such children.

Before any of the so called special methods can be applied your child needs to go through an evaluation in order to determine the level of the problem and the speech impediment. Once the evaluation is complete the school or a professional can create a learning program for your child. There is no such thing as a cure for dyslexia, but the kids with this problem can learn to overcome it. But this is hard work and a long process, so parents support and love is necessary at all times. It is very hard for a kid to deal with dyslexia and even more learning can influence the child, so special attention from the family is a must.

In the end this is nothing to worry about, with love from the family and professional help your child can fight dyslexia and learn to overcome it, after all there are plenty of smart and successful people with dyslexia.

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July 4, 2010

Child and Teen Obesity

Filed under: obesity — Tags: child and teen obesity, child teen obesity, healthy weight, obese, parenting teens, parenting teens blog, regina benjamin, teen obesity. obesity — admin @ 3:23 pm

Every year studies show that child and teen obesity is on the rise in the US. Nevertheless, 84% of parents think their children are of the right and healthy weight, but the studies show that over one third of children population in the US is having obesity problems. “Obesity is one of the biggest public health challenges the country has ever faced, and troubling disparities exist based on race, ethnicity, region, and income,” said Jeffrey Levi, director of Trust for America's Health.

This is a real problem and we are facing it, but so far, normal people of the United States fail to see that. Is the pride or vanity it doesn’t matter, the fact that people are not recognizing this alarming fact may lead to even troubling issues. Obesity is not a cute chubby child, obesity is when a child has over 25% of body fat and that is the threshold of unhealthy weight and fat levels. All of that can lead to far serious problems; one of the most common results of obesity is heart disease. There are plenty of other devastating effects of obesity like diabetes, stroke and other life threatening medical problems. The fact that over 300,000 people die because of obesity doesn’t seem to reach to people. This is the time to act; parents need to understand the consequences of obesity, further more they need to understand how pressing this issue is. Maybe the fact that kids between ages 10 and 13 that are obese have over 80% chance of becoming obese adults, which means all of their lives are at risk, are you willing to allow that for your child?

Surgeon General Regina Benjamin said: “Since 1980, obesity has doubled in adults and tripled in children. That, to me, is just astonishing.”

She knows the problem and the only way she sees as the solution is engagement by the parents. Trying to get your kid to lose weight at an early age can be very hard and we are all aware of that. What she recommends is playing the sport card. Trying to explain to your child that he needs to jump rope 50 times a day to lose weight will not work, but telling him to do that because it is related to something he loves, like being able to jump further or play sports like some sportsman he or she loves, will do the trick.

Regina Benjamin is aware that the only method we have left is to activate as parents and put more attention to our children’s health. Although not an easy task we need to make our children go out more. The computer era came knocking at our door and we didn’t even realize what it has done to our children. Instead of playing out of the house, running, jumping rope, they are all stuck inside playing video games, they are not moving, that is the problem and we allowed that. So it’s time for all of us to start again if we want our children to be healthy. You have to realize, obesity is a rising problem and the number of obese children is increasing as we speak. Learn about obesity and help your children for their future, for their health.

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